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01
Radar disengaged
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Cats will absolutely give one tiny ear twitch just to let you know they heard you, and then continue ignoring everything you said anyway. That little ear movement somehow feels even more disrespectful because it confirms they fully understood the assignment and simply chose not to participate. They are basically saying, “I heard you loud and clear, but I do not feel like dealing with that right now.” Cats really perfected passive-aggressive communication without ever needing to say a single word.
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02
Enough
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03
Cat smarts
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04
Hearing abilities
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05
Getting the reps in
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06
Selective participation
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07
Heard and declined
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08
Hearing but ignoring
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09
Listening is optional
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10
No compliance
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11
Purrfessional ignoring
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12
Fake sleeping
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If your cat doesn't respond when you call them, it's not because they did not hear you. Cats can hear a treat bag opening from the opposite side of the house while fully asleep. They hear every single thing happening around them. The real issue is that cats carefully decide whether responding is worth their time or not. Call them over for cuddles or food and suddenly they appear instantly. Ask them to stop scratching something or get off the counter and they act like the connection completely dropped. Selective hearing is basically a built-in cat feature at this point.
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13
Sudden interest
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14
Make them listen
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15
Science
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16
Don't ignore my ignoring
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17
Cover them ears
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18
50% listening
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19
Not my name
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20
In one ear, out the other
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21
At least there's cuddles
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22
What???
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23
Listening over
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24
Who cares?
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Cats will stand on the counter driving you completely insane while acting like they have absolutely no idea why you are upset. You can say “get off the counter” fifteen times in a row and they just stare at you, blink slowly, and continue standing there like tiny furry criminals with zero remorse. Some cats even make it worse by knocking something over while maintaining eye contact the entire time. They hear every single word too. They just decided your opinion is not relevant to their countertop activities.
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25
Asleep until snacks
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26
No talking, hooman
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27
Paparazzi
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28
Nicknames
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29
Listening in
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30
Selective audio processing
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